BUILD BACK, BETTER

HER EMPOWERED DIVORCE

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST: Ilyssa Panitz, Divorce Journalist & Commentator

SUMMARY:

On this episode of Her Empowered Divorce we’re finding out why – far from a tragic ending – divorce can signal the start of a whole new chapter in life. Host Beverly Price’s guest is Ilyssa Panitz, a multi-media journalist who is an expert on the topic. A survivor herself, Ilyssa knows how important it is to reclaim our voices and recognize our agency in the face of challenges like domestic violence or financial uncertainty. It’s a process that starts with mindset and a determination to #Survive & Thrive! “You’re going to feel so different as an individual (post-divorce),” says Ilyssa, host of “The Divorce Hour” on CRN Digital Talk Radio. “I think women develop more confidence, are happier, feel more at peace and start liking themselves.” You’ll learn why there’s no rush to start up a new relationship (especially if you haven’t spent any time “dating yourself” first!) and how to cultivate a deeper appreciation for all that the mature you brings to the table. Divorce can be your new beginning, but it’s not a journey to be taken alone, says Ilyssa. Reach out for the support of good friends – new and old – and consider enlisting the wisdom of trusted coaches and advisers to help get through one of life’s trickiest and most stressful transitions – only to emerge feeling stronger and better than ever on the other side! “Divorce is really just your intermission,” says Ilyssa. “The first act of your life may be done, but we have yet to see what’s going to play out.”

Keep up with all Ilyssa’s latest thoughts by tuning in for "The Divorce Hour," her weekly program on CRN Digital Talk Radio. It’s also a podcast available on every major platform!

Click here to access a free link for Beverly’s practical handbook, “12 Tips to Empowerment.” Or to schedule a complimentary private consultation, you can reach out to her at this link. You can also join Beverly’s Empowered Divorce Women’s Meetup Group here.

Visit this link to access the entire archive of Her Empowered Divorce episodes and while you’re there, please subscribe, rate and review our show!

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

· Invitation to Reinvention: How the “D” in divorce can stand for “Do-Over” rather than “Drama” or “Destruction.”

· Becoming the “Divorce Journalist:” What (in addition to a rough divorce of her own) inspired Ilyssa to do her homework and become an expert on the subject.

· Communicating Shared Information: About the pragmatic roadmap Ilyssa brings to listeners, viewers and readers navigating all aspects of divorce.

· Roadblocks Ilyssa Had to Surmount in the Divorce Process:

o Ignorance of the broad nature (and consequences) of domestic violence.

o Cluelessness about all things financial planning and management.

o False starts with attorneys whose services weren’t a good fit.

o Pandemic uncertainty.

· Surviving & Thriving: Why Ilyssa was determined to demonstrate that she could bounce back and prevail over any adversity, especially as a model for her children.

· Support Systems: About the importance of plugging into people who offer nonjudgmental camaraderie, humor, info and a variety of viewpoints. Don’t be afraid to ask for help!

· Looking Back: A worthy exercise if it prevents a repeat of past stumbles or regrets.

· Embracing the Past: Ilyssa believes it’s important – especially for children – to recognize that even marriages that dissolve were once founded in love.

· Moving Forward: If your relationship didn’t work out or you weren’t the priority you should have been, then it’s time to start afresh and find the relationship you deserve.

· Words to Live By While Divorcing: #Survive & Thrive – #Build Back Better!

· Word to the Wise: If You’re Going to Date Anyone, Date Yourself:

o Make a profile just for you!

o Do fun little things just for yourself.

o Take moments to indulge.

o Cultivate deeper self-understanding.

o Journal thoughts.

o Rediscover who you are at your core (not as a friend, partner, parent).

· Dating Advice: Focus on exploring what you want and need as part of a holistic process that will set you up to meet people in a place of maturity and readiness.

· Reasons Dating After 40 or 50 is Great:

o You’ve already done the big milestone wedding.

o You’ve likely already had your kids.

o You’re established in your life, career and priorities.

o You’ve earned self-confidence – and that’s attractive!

· Timing is Everything: There’s no rush! Take the pressure off and while waiting for the right person to come along, make yourself the kind of person who will attract them.

· Top Three Tips for Women in the Midst of Divorce:

#1: Remember that your divorce is NOT the grand finale. You’re just about to start a whole new act in the play that is your life.

#2: Ask hard questions: What do I truly want? Look at the whole big picture!

#3: Take stock of lessons learned in the marriage and what you choose to leave behind or avoid going into future relationships.

NOTABLE QUOTES:

· “Divorce is really just your intermission. The first act of your life may be done, but we have yet to see what’s going to play out.” (Ilyssa)

· “Divorce is really all about mindset and if you are determined to say, ‘I want all these great new beginnings’ … it’s such a great opportunity.” (Ilyssa)

· “I didn’t realize that domestic violence can happen to anyone. It’s not just physical, it’s emotional and mental. It’s stalking, religious, financial, sexual, so many things.” (Ilyssa)

· “Watching your life go up in smoke is gut-wrenching and you’ve got to stay strong, especially when you’re that mom or that stable parent.” (Ilyssa)

· “You’re going to feel so different as an individual (post-divorce). I think women develop more confidence, are happier, feel more at peace and start liking themselves better.” (Ilyssa)

· “One thing I’m very firm about is don’t go from your divorce quickly into another relationship without learning about yourself first.” (Beverly)

· “The beauty of age is that it gives you those experiences and makes for more stimulating conversation!” (Ilyssa)

· “If people stop putting all these rushes on things, trying to fill a void they feel is created by what’s no longer there, the results (of dating) will be a lot more positive.” (Ilyssa)

FURTHER RESOURCES/RELEVANT LINKS:

· Find out more about Ilyssa’s Authority Magazine column, "How to Survive and Thrive During and After Divorce."

· Beverly’s personal Facebook page can be found here.

· Women’s Divorce and Empowerment group discussion available here.

ABOUT OUR GUEST:

Ilyssa Panitz is a Divorce Journalist focused solely on topics related to navigating this major life transition. She writes a divorce column for “Authority Magazine” on Medium and has also been a contributing reporter on the topic of divorce for a number of outlets. Ilyssa serves as the Content/Editorial Producer for The National Association of Divorce Professionals and hosts a nationally syndicated and live streaming radio show called, “The Divorce Hour with Ilyssa Panitz,” which airs every Saturday and Sunday on CRN Digital Talk Radio and on a variety of streaming platforms.

FOLLOW OUR GUEST:

WEBSITE | INSTAGRAM | LINKEDIN | TIKTOK

ABOUT YOUR HOST:

Beverly Price is a CDC Certified Divorce®️, Women’s empowerment and Pre-Mediation coach with over 25 years of experience. Her passion lies in supporting women through every aspect of separation and divorce. She helps women eliminate the pain. overwhelm, anger and sadness of divorce and guides them through divorce from contemplation to decision to the legal and financial process of divorce and mediation on to recovery from divorce.

She offers a comprehensive coaching experience that goes beyond just empowerment work to help clients develop their communication, conflict management, boundary setting and negotiation skills. Beverly also provides expertise on the technical, legal, and financial aspects of the divorce process including mediation. Women will learn how to evaluate whether they want to stay or go in their marriage and how to make the best possible decisions for themselves and their families. With a holistic approach that combines goal-oriented strategies with emotional support, Beverly’s coaching helps clients build a positive and fulfilling future for themselves and their families during and after divorce.

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